How To Include The Groom In The Wedding Planning

Although it is common for the groom to take more of a passive approach to wedding planning, it makes the wedding a better reflection of both of you if he is more involved. Take him along when you go visit the caterer, when you're picking the location for the wedding and the reception, and so on. There are also some simple ways to draw him in to a more involved role in the wedding planning process:

Give Him Lists

Most men work best from a list or when given specific instructions on what needs to be completed. This makes him feel useful and involved without having to know the minute details of wedding planning. Give him monthly or even weekly lists of wedding planning tasks that he can accomplish on his own.

Give Him Choices

Rather than asking him what color scheme he was considering or what wedding themes he is interested in, try giving choices instead. Does he like black and white or rose and gray color themes? Does he like traditional weddings or prefer something a little more laid back? If he likes laid back, does he want a theme such as a Beach wedding or something that reflects one of his interests? Choices will also get the ideas flowing, and he may surprise you with some suggestions of his own.

Give Him Tasks That Interest Him

Consider his interests and hobbies when you make the monthly or weekly lists. Does he like music? Then, put him in charge of song selection for the reception. Is he into computers? Maybe he'd like to get the wedding Web site set up. Every man likes food, so be sure to include him in selecting the food and cake for the wedding. Selecting the limousine is also research that might be of interest to the groom.

Give Him the Honeymoon

Planning the honeymoon is an area in which your groom can play an active role. This is a difficult task to relinquish, as it is an important facet of the wedding decisions. But, allowing him to make decisions on what is one of the most interesting pieces of the wedding planning process, will help make your trip and your wedding reflect both of you.

Consider His Interests

Integrating more of your groom's interests into the wedding day is another way to personalize your event. For example, having a butler pass out his favorite drink at the reception, or include wines from his family's home state or country, have bowls of his favorite candy placed on all the tables, or use a family recipe as one of the dishes served at the reception. The rehearsal dinner, traditionally hosted by the groom's family, is yet another way to bring out his interests, his family traditions, and his personality.

Lastly, there is the groom's cake. Don't hide it in the corner. Set it right out in the middle of things. Groom's cakes can be just as elaborate as the wedding cake itself. It's shape can be anything from a tennis racket to a computer to pieces of sushi. Request a cake that reflects his personality or his career. Cake not his favorite? There's no rule that says it has to be cake.

Any or all of these efforts will help you and your husband-to-be both express yourselves on your special day.